My Journey with Self-Advocacy

For much of my life, self-advocacy felt overwhelming and foreign. As someone navigating life as a queer, partially blind, late-identified autistic-ADHDer with C-PTSD, asking for what I needed often felt like taking up too much space—a concept deeply tied to both my cultural upbringing and internalized survival mechanisms. I struggled with the fear of being perceived as difficult or burdensome, and this made it even harder to speak up about my needs.

It’s been a journey to unlearn those fears and realize that there’s nothing wrong with advocating for yourself. But let me be clear: it wasn’t something I achieved overnight or on my own. Sometimes, it does take a neuroaffirming and supportive community for you to feel safe enough to take up space and ask for what you need—and that’s okay. There is no shame in leaning on those who empower and uplift you.

What I’ve learned along the way is that the right people and organizations will not only accommodate but will go out of their way to work with you, to make sure you feel seen, heard, and valued. When you stay true to yourself and remain aligned with your values, you create space for authentic connections and environments where you can thrive.

Tips for Self-Advocacy

1. Embrace the Journey of Advocacy

• Self-advocacy isn’t a linear process, and that’s okay. Start by acknowledging where you’re at and celebrating small wins along the way. Your journey might not look like someone else’s, but it’s yours to own.
• Example: For me, the first step was simply sharing my experiences with a trusted friend. Over time, I began to feel more confident articulating my needs in professional spaces.

2. Build a Supportive Network

• Surround yourself with neuroaffirming and understanding individuals who validate your experiences. Community support can provide the safety net needed to take your first steps in self-advocacy.
• Example: Joining a group of other neurodivergent professionals helped me recognize the value of my voice and feel less alone in my challenges.

3. Reframe Asking for Support as a Strength

• Self-advocacy is not about being demanding—it’s about creating environments that help you and others thrive. Recognizing this can make the process feel less daunting.
• Example: I began to view accommodations, such as flexible deadlines or additional processing time, as tools for success rather than special treatment.

4. Stay True to Yourself

• Your unique perspective is your strength. Advocate in ways that feel authentic and aligned with your values, even if it takes time to figure out what that looks like for you.

5. Trust the Right Spaces

• Not every environment will be ready to meet you where you are—and that’s not a reflection of your worth. The right people and organizations will collaborate with you to create solutions that work.
• Example: When I started advocating for more structured workflows in a past role, the organization not only adapted but incorporated the feedback into team-wide practices.

6. Advocate Gradually

• Start small and build momentum. Focus on achievable changes that allow you to build confidence over time.
• Example: I started by asking for meeting agendas in advance to better prepare, which eventually led to larger conversations about inclusive workplace practices.

Self-Advocacy in Practice

• Workplace Example: In one role, I advocated for a mentorship program that paired neurodivergent employees with supportive leaders. This not only benefited me but also created a ripple effect, fostering a more inclusive workplace culture.
• Personal Growth Example: I learned to set boundaries by communicating my needs clearly, such as requesting buffer time between meetings to manage energy levels, which improved both my performance and well-being.

Final Takeaway

Self-advocacy is a practice that evolves with time and support. It’s about finding spaces where your voice is valued and where you can show up as your authentic self. Remember, asking for what you need isn’t a weakness; it’s an act of courage and self-respect. The right environments will recognize your worth and collaborate with you to create spaces where everyone can thrive. Stay true to yourself, honor your values, and know that your journey is valid.